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 If you suspect anyone of showing sympoms of the 'Necro- Mortosis' Virus, the Government has released the following anonymous tip line. 1 800 155 3219
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| Bus
Crashes in Heavy Traffic- Driver Reanimated |
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According to a swiftly released Police blotter, the incident unfolded as follows: 8:57am- Bus leaves Sydney Bus terminal for Macquarie University 9:45am - According to eye witnesses, the bus driver exhibits symptoms of sickness. 10:05am - Bus driver loses control, bus slides across three lanes and becomes stuck on concrete divider just South of the Lane Cove Road turnpike. No other vehicle was involved in the initial accident 10:07am - As passing motorists are assisting injured passengers, the driver reanimates and attacks 22 year old Patrick Norton as he lays prone with a broken ankle 10:08am - Patrick Norton reanimates as the bus driver attacks a passenger (unidentified at present) assisting an elderly woman off the bus, the passenger was killed due to heavy trauma inflicted to his throat. The elderly woman escaped unharmed 10:09am - Patrick Norton bites 2 other passengers unable to move due to injuries sustained in the inital accident, 4 now infected and one 'static' (un-risen). 10:11am - Fire and Emergency crews arrive and enter bus un briefed of current situation, firefighter Frank Hyland (23) at tacked and infected. 10:13am - All passengers successfully evacuated from bus. Five reanimates begin to exit. 10:15am - Two Police Officers arrive and neutralize Hugh Brindell (the reanimated bus driver), the other reanimates disappear amongst general confusion. 10:16am - Tactical Response Group (SWAT) notified and scrambled to scene in helicopter 10:26am - TRG arrives and cordons off 3 square kilometer area. Close down M2 with roadblocks both on north and southbound lanes, and initiate search for reanimates 10:31am - First reanimate found attempting to enter vehicle, shots fired and one confirmed re-kill. 10:33am - Second reanimate, Frank Hyland found to have breached North Bound roadblock and into oncoming traffic, TRG officers in pursuit 10:38am - Frank Hyland neutralized 10:43am - One reanimate spotted by helicopter near Macquarie Park, TRG in pursuit 10:48am - Patrick Norton neutralized at southbound roadblock 10:52am - Police helicopter loses reanimate in trees near Macquaruie Park; Hazmat Arrives on original crash scene 10:59am - Cyclists report to police - reanimate wandering along Fontenoy Road near Fontenoy Park 11:06am - TRG catches last errant reanimate and renders neutralized 4:35pm- Hazmat declares area secure; both lanes reopened. This is a blow for new prime minister Kevin Rudd as he struggles to keep election promises. A spokesman for him told ZWN to expect a press conference held in the next few days over the incident. It is the first necro-mortosis case in one of Australia's larger cities, and official are investigating how Mr Brindell came into contact with the virus. |
Carnage
on the roads of Australia's busy M2 Motorway this morning. At approximately
10:05am, bus driver Hugh Brindell (56) collapsed and died at the wheel
of his passenger bus, causing the vehicle to slide across three lanes
of heavy traffic on Sydney's M2 Motorway, finally coming to rest on
a concrete divider. Six of the twenty five passengers were injured in
the initial crash but it was the next set of events that occurred which
made this simple traffic incident into Australia's worst 'mortosis'
related incident yet.